Financial Stress and its effect on Relationships

Cost of living and employment insecurity is a frequent source of stress. In the United States, almost a third of people in a relationship identified financial issues as a significant issue with their partner (American Psychological Association, 2015). Being able to recognize the signs of financial stress and understanding how it can impact your relationships is important. If you recognize any of the following interactions or behaviours outlined below for yourself and your partner, counselling can equip you with more awareness and tools to overcome your challenges. 

Here are the signs of financial stress:

1. Frequent arguments about money 

2. Emotional distance and avoidance 

   1. Are you pulling away from the people you care about because talking about financial issues causes you to feel even more stressed?

3. Increased anxiety or depression 

   1. Are you staying awake at night worrying about money? 

4. Resentment over who earns more/pays more and keeping earnings separate (Mcwhinney, 2024). 

5. Power games (Mcwhinney, 2024) 

   1. This can happen when one partner earns an income while another partner stays at home or when one partner earns significantly more than the other. It is often the partner that earns the most money that has the most say in financial decisions. 

Ways to Address the Financial Stress

• Focus on communication with your partner/family

  • Sometimes beliefs and expectations about money can differ between you and your partner. These beliefs are often formed during childhood (American Psychological Association, 2015).

• Try to set financial goals as a team (American Psychological Association, 2015) 

  • It’s important to ensure that these goals are realistic.

• Seek help through counselling as needed (American Psychological Association, 2015)

  • It can be difficult to communicate or set financial goals when overwhelmed by anxiety and stress. A counsellor can assist with developing the necessary skills to help you meet your goals in a pace that works for both you and your partner. 

Working with a counsellor can also restore harmony, intimacy and peace. The best case scenario would be that you and your partner can be the best advocates for one another because it always helps to feel loved and supported during challenging times.

References

American Psychological Association. (2015). Happy couples: How to avoid money arguments. https://www.apa.org/topics/money/conflict

Mcwhinney, J. (2024, September 19). Top 6 Marriage-Killing Money Issues.  Investopedia. https://www.investopedia.com/articles/pf/09/marriage-killing-money-issues.asp